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My Advice from Dr. Laura Berman

Do you know who Dr. Laura Berman is?


You've seen her on Oprah -- she was the doctor they would bring on to consult with couples.  She is one of the top sex & relationships therapists in the US, and I love her because her advice is REAL.

I've had XM in my car for about a year now, and the main reason is because of her radio show on Oprah's channel.  My drive home from work was often filled with lots of laughs and always good, solid relationship advice.  Sometimes I got out of my car a little baffled ... really, we're supposed to be doing a few hundred kegels a day?  Whaaaaaaat!  I'm sorry if that is TMI, but come on gals, it's the health of our bodies we're talking about here.

So anyway, imagine my shock when I tuned in last Friday afternoon around 5:10 on my way home from work and I caught her midsentence saying ".... so that's all I can say about that, but just know that this is not goodbye forever, it's just goodbye for now."  STOP. IT.  Dr. Berman no longer on XM?!  And then she mentioned that that very day -- last Friday -- was actually going to be her last day on air. 

So I grabbed my phone and started dialing frantically.  This was my one and only chance to talk to her, ya'll!  I felt like I was back in high school again calling our local radio station incessantly to request a Paula Abdul song or win a "prize pack," whatever that was.

I got busy signal after busy signal after busy signal.  After hearing that first busy signal tone, I'd hang up and hit redial.  Then I got a text from Ian asking me to call him.  He said, "I've tried calling you two times, and it's going straight to voicemail!"  I was embarrassed to say that I'd probably made 74 attempts to call Oprah's radio station in the 8 minutes I'd been in the car and that was probably why his call didn't go thru.  I totally blamed it on being in a "bad signal area" HA.

After speaking with him, I thought I'd try her just a few more times.  Ya'll.  I got through.  The call screeners asked me what I was calling about so I got my thoughts together and told them.  And then, they said they'd put me on hold and do their best to get me on air with her.

By this time I'd arrived home and ran into the house to clue Ian in to what was going on.  He was excited for me because he knows how much I love Dr. Berman's advice!  He even got my car keys ready so that when I got through he could run out to my car and listen to me talk to her.

Next thing I knew, I was on the radio with Dr. Berman herself!  I wished her the best of luck in her future endeavors and told her that I was a newlywed who always thought I'd wait until Ian and I had a relationship issue to give her a call, but since that was the last day to call in, I wanted to just ask her how to make the most out of our marriage and make every day count.

Dr. Berman told me that the most important thing for us to focus on was the big picture of our marriage.  She said that often times, couples let very small things come between them, and these small issues build and fester into larger issues that can cause resentment.  She said that by realizing that we are in this relationship together and we are ALLIES, we will continue to thrive as a couple. 

And she's sending me some books!  This one and this one will be headed my way.  If you want more information about her books, her show on TV, or just her in general, visit her website.  She also has a great page on Facebook that you can check out.

Did you watch Dr. Berman on Oprah or listen to her XM show?  Speaking of relationship advice, what's some good advice that you received?  Not necessarily just husband/wife advice, but all relationships in general -- marriage, dating, family, friend relationships.  Please share!

14 comments:

  1. I cannot believe you got to speak to her! I listen to her on XM also and I love her advice. We have already implemented some of her advice into planning our marriage. So excited that you are getting those books. I need to get the marriage ones and start reading. Love her!

    xoxo.

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  2. That is so exciting you got through!!!!

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  3. This is Dr. Laura Berman's husband posting. Thank you for your kind blog posting about her. I show her all these mentions of her name and they always bring a smile to her face. I must say that we will all miss her radio show...except or family. The radio show was aired aroubnd bed time and our little boys will get her for the whole story time instead of half. You can still see her on Access Hollywood Live every other Wednesday, her OWN show, In The Bedroom with Dr. Laura Berman, will begin airing its second season in January and watch her website www.DrLauraBerman.com to find her other upcoming appearances. Keep watching and listening, she really loves all of you!

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  4. That is SO awesome you go through!! I love her too. I just think she is so real and legit!

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  5. So super cool!! Probably a once in a lifetime opportunity to talk to her and you did it! I'm going to have to check out her books.

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  6. Great post. I really like your blog.^^

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  7. And her husband commented on your blog? Say what?!!! You're kind of a celebrity/counselor by association now, right? ;) I love that you got through and got to talk to a mentor of yours, and I LOVE that she now gets to be at home with her kids at night!!

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  8. That's SO cool that you got through and were able to talk ~ I love her advice!!

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  9. That is VERY cool! I have my radio shows that I love, and I'd be just as excited if I got through and got to talk with them. And what wonderful advice that she gave you. I (way too often) focus on the little things when it's the big picture I need to focus on.

    One of the best pieces of advice I ever got was from a pastor. He said to never put all my faith in my husband, because I will ALWAYS be let down. My husband isn't perfect and he never will be. Instead, put my faith in Jesus and that is when I will be happiest. When my husband makes me SO mad over the littlest things, I try to remind myself of this. He will never live up to all my expectations because he is human. It's such a humbling reminder.

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  10. That is soo cool! And great advice I'll remember forever. I'll have to check out her books, thanks!

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  11. Eeek! I am so excited for you haha I let out a little shriek hehe :)

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  12. So great to hear that she will be home with her family. & its also great that her husband and family also support her career, which is hard to come by in life. Im glad to hear she will be home with her babies and husband...reading stories & getting to enjoy "the good stuff." I recently quit working nearly as much [running my business] & it was hard but my husbands job is time consuming & one of us needed to be at home more to keep things smooth & let our kids know that we are here. always. I will leave my advice comment separately after...If. Laura or her spouse read this...you are a great woman. You inspire & motivate many in ways that so many just are afraid to seek help for or recognize they even need that help.

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  13. So, I have been married 10 years next June...which I have to say has flown by much of the time. 10 years is NOT easy by any means..& there are days when liking my husband wasnt really an option and I am sure he has felt the same. However, the LOVE is always there. ALWAYS.

    I dont think there is any magic piece of advice that will save anyone or any relationship. There are however, several mannerisms you can carry with you that will aid you in the hard times & also remind you of your love in its young days when all is well..

    for my marriage, we choose to "pick our battles." there are just some things that you will never agree upon, so why argue them?! another thing we really pride ourselves on is our sex life. We have 3 little girls & we have always had an amazing sex life but we truly pride ourselves on the fact that we dont RELY on it. It is there & wonderful but not something that we need ALL the time. After all, life is busy with 3 kids. I really could offer so much more advice but dont want to be a comment hog...BOTTOM LINE: always be open & honest with one another and it will work. If you could see how open we are in our house...some might croak..but we laugh ALOT & have so much fun and we always know where each other stands..and that is priceless. Glad I found your blog. I will read it regularly!

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