We are really missing Drake. Last night before bed, we were looking at photos of him and I cried some more. He was fifteen years old; his days mainly consisted of sleeping. He couldn't take walks with us anymore and he had to be carried to the car and lifted in and out of it. This was a dog who used to live for car rides and would bound into my car for our Friday night pizza pick-up. I loved having him in the car with me and seeing cars of kids next to us who were in awe at this smiling husky.
Drake was on two different pills, a liquid pain medication, two eye drops and one eye lubricant -- all of this two times daily. He had a tumor removed surgically last Valentines Day but he had two more growing on him, one above his eye and one on his paw. He couldn't walk on hardwood floors anymore so we had small rugs all around the house for him like lilypads. He didn't talk to us like he used to (if you've ever seen the YouTube of the husky "saying" I love you, that's what I'm talking about). He really just slept a lot. He stopped sleeping in our room with us and slept in the den. He was having accidents in the house a few times a week. He didn't even love chewing on bones as he once did. We would give them to him and he would just ignore them towards the very end.
We consulted our vet who said that it would be an appropriate time for us to consider saying goodbye to him and that, while it was our certainly our choice, it would be a very respectful way of letting Drake move on. The vet said that we were not rushing this decision (our main concern). I mean, how do you decide when it's time? But on the other hand, it was obvious that his health was rapidly declining, and I feared that we would be out and about having fun one day only to return home and see that he'd passed by himself, without anyone there beside him.
Without going into too much detail, when he did pass, he felt immense love. Lots of hands on him, stroking his fur, whispering in his ear, holding him.
I am writing this post because I didn't feel like there were a lot of people that I could really talk to about the intricacies of this decision and the process. So, with that said, if you ever find yourself in this situation and you are looking for someone to talk to, or someone to whom you can ask questions, please email me.
Thank you ALL for your thoughts, your prayers, your comments on my last blog post, your texts, and the emails you sent. It means more than you know.