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Thursday

Thoughts + Confessions On Thursday

WHAT.
A.
WEEK.

 A long, crazy, busy week.

Do you ever just feel like waving that little white flag? 
I'm so there.
What is keeping me sane is that I get to see girlfriends this weekend for some much-needed R+R. And not a moment too soon.

25 Quotes That Will Inspire You To Be A Fearless Writer

And if you don't mind a little venting, then here we go...

+ As a working mother, it has been difficult for me to feel like I'm giving 100% to anything. Husband, child, work, girlfriends, hobbies. This is my #1 struggle right now.

+ My #2 struggle is with our home. I am perfectly content living in a smaller home close to all the action of Charlotte. But it scares me that at some point we will run out of space, and it is wayyy expensive to buy a larger home in our neighborhood. I'm nervous about moving away from the area I love, moving away from friends, affording what will inevitably be a higher mortgage, and possibly losing the charm of an older home.

+ We went to look at a house for the second time this week and I was just SURE that we would be putting an offer on it. Sadly, I think we have too many "cons" that outweigh the "pros" and it just doesn't make sense to jump into it right now. Hard to go back to square one.

+ Camille had pink eye this week, so there's that.

+ I constantly struggle with procrastination. I will pat myself on the back for ordering a Fathers Day gift today ... I pleasantly surprised myself by taking care of that task in advance.

+ It's not even summer yet, and I feel like 90% of our summer weekends are spoken for. A good problem to have, I guess, but I honestly love lazy weekends just laying on the couch with my family. Or even by myself. :)

To end on a happy note:
One more thing I'm proud of is that I finally created an account with Mint so I can track our monthly spending and do a better job of budgeting for our family. We are not big spenders for the most part, but we also don't adhere to any sort of formal budget plan. And I'd like to change that, or at least stick to a budget for certain categories, like groceries. We were spending too much at the store, and by meal-planning and visiting the grocery store less, I truly feel like we can cut our monthly spending drastically.

Thank you for letting me vent a little bit today. Whooooo-SAH.

giving up on being perfect and work on becoming yourself // anna quindlen

46 comments:

  1. Hang in there, girl! I'm sure you're doing a great job. I recently blogged the same exact thing about my thoughts of being a full-time mama and it's so hard!! And poor Camille, pink eye. We dealt with that before Avery turned one and it stinks! Eye drops for little ones are SO not fun! Hope you have a relaxing weekend and can recharge a bit!

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    1. GIRL. She hates the eye drops. I need to develop a game out of giving them to her or something. It pains me to give them to her because I hate making her cry!

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  2. We all have days and weeks where things just seem a bit "discombobulated" at times (that's a word right? No?) I'm sure things will work out just fine with your house, and when the time comes to move, you will know and will have a peace about it!:) I'm counting on knowing when that time is for us as well because we live in a very small home and will definitely need to upgrade as the kids get older - and I'm not looking forward to a mortgage upgrade either:( Hoping Camille feels better soon!

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    1. Definitely a word I use a LOT to describe all of the juggling :) And yes, that mortgage upgrade is no bueno, but my mom (who always has good wisdom) encouraged me by saying that the thought of paying more always seems scary, but somehow (as long as you make wise choices) you just find a way to make it all work out and adopt it as your new "normal". I remember seeing that happen when I went up to a higher car payment.

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  3. Sending you a hug this morning! Hope you get a great weekend with lots of rest of Camille snuggles!!

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    1. Thanks Rach - you know that baby snuggles definitely make it all better.

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  4. I worked part time from home and part time in the office and I used to feel like that all the time. Its hard to give anything a 100%. Sadly I think my husband got neglected the most. Once I had two kids we made the decision for me to stay home and I feel less scattered but the trade off is we are on strict budget because its hard to live on one income in NY. Which leads me to my next comment Charlotte housing. We talk about moving to Charlotte all the time. We have visited the town of Matthews and loved some of the developments there. Is that considered far out from the city? Just looking for some input from an insider.

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    1. Sara, YES! I'm mostly working from home but one day a week from the office. And it's definitely challenging. And, come on down to Charlotte! Matthews is a bit of a drive from "Charlotte proper" but not bad. Plus, it is a charming little town in itself with a lot of amenities, so you wouldn't have to drive into Charlotte all the time. More bang for your buck house-wise, too, from what I've seen!

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  5. Great quote at the end. I love Anna Quindlen's writing. It seems like you're doing a phenomenal job on everything, and I really admire how you seem to do everything! I hope this weekend comes soon for you all and everyone is feeling better.

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    1. Leslie, you are always so sweet. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

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  6. I'm right there with you on the working mom thing. It's seriously THE hardest job ever. You just feel like a ball always has to drop somewhere, and it just breaks your heart when it has to be your family! I feel for you, girl. And on the pink eye? Walker had it twice...in two weeks. I wanted to rip my hair out! I just keep telling myself that he will be completely immune to everything once Kindergarten rolls around and we very well may (and better) have a kiddo who has perfect attendance because he's already gotten ALL his sickness OUT! :) Hope you have a better day today and enjoy your girls' weekend!

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    1. Twice in two weeks - ugh! Isn't it the worst seeing them not at 100%? But you are right about those little immune systems being built up! Thanks so much for your thoughtful words. :)

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  7. I can relate to so much! Especially #1. This has been my biggest struggle this week. I've only blogged once in four days and I feel like I am neglecting it, but it's the first thing to go when my job or my family needs something. Hoping next week will be better. It's a new week and a new start :) Hope you have a nice, relaxing weekend!

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    1. New week and a new start is right. Clean slate! :) Thank goodness for the weekends so we can get our heads on straight again :)

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  8. We're not big spenders either but, we love making budgets! Life is actually much better when we do! Lately though we haven't stuck with it as much which needs to change! Sorry for the rough week... A relaxing weekend is just ahead!

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    1. I'm like you, I actually like working under a budget. I like having clear and concise goals!

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  9. Thanks for posting! Feeling many of the same things this week!

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    1. It's always nice to know we are not alone in the struggle!

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  10. Sending lots of hugs your way. Mint has helped us with planning and budgeting so much. Especially when moving since it helps us plan ahead for big expenses.

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    1. I'm glad to hear you have a positive experience with it. I'm amazed at all that you can track on it!

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  11. Such a honest and real struggles....take it day by day....that seems to be the only advice that truly allows me to just breath, relax, and enjoy the moment.

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    1. Tess, you are so right. You are going to be a fabulous mama!

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  12. I think your #1 struggle is what most modern women worry about. I know I do and baby isn't even here yet. Have y'all thought about adding on to your current house? That way you stay in the neighborhood, but get some extra space.

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    1. Sarah, you are so right. We have definitely thought about adding on, but we are unsure if we'd get the $ back out of it ... and it may be easier to just move out rather than do a large renovation/addition. But definitely something we are considering! We LOVE our home and our area!

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    2. Yes, be very careful about that. Homes in our area average $200-$250K and a homeowner near me just spent $50K on renovations last year and doubled the size of their house from 1500 sq. ft to 3100 sq. ft...they now have it on the market for $350K! They will NEVER get that amount in a neighborhood with houses built in the 60's! It's crazy and mind boggling. My thing was that if you were going to spend that kind of cash improving your home-why on earth are you moving?! Stay put and enjoy your hard work and then maybe ten years from now you might see the return on your investment but uh, not right now you won't. So crazy!

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  13. I've been a working full-time mom since 2007 and let me tell you, it never gets easier sadly. My kids are 16 and nearly 12 and my 12 year old came out of school on Tuesday with a straight A's report card for the entire school year and I couldn't share in that joy.in.that.moment. My mom picked her up from school since school got out at 10:30 a.m. Yes, 10:30 a.m....I was heartbroken and teary. It was awful and I had serious working mom guilt the rest of the day. I feel your pain (we've had pink eye where three of the four got it as well) a number of years ago and it was truly awful-especially for someone like me who wears contact lenses...oy! I can suggest that you just live each day doing the best you can. I can also tell you my house isn't nearly as clean as it used to be and I've learned that it's okay because my kids are nearly out of the house and then I'll have plenty of time to clean up the dust bunnies. For now, I live in the moment with them and do all the fun things that I can, while I can. Blessings to your sweet family, your daughter is just an absolute doll and I love following along with your family.

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    1. Toni, I love love love your wise words. And I can tell that you are a very devoted and caring mother. It is definitely hard bearing the guilt of not being there for everything, every special moment. But it is just what we have to do in this season of our lives, I guess! Hugs, and thank you again for your sweet comment.

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    2. Awww, thank you April for your kind words, that means a lot and you are very welcome. My kids are my everything and why I do everything that I do. I love the title of Mom, best title ever! Just keep savoring each day and you can never shower them with enough hugs and kisses, that's for sure! Have a wonderful weekend and big hugs to you! Your blog is a favorite read of mine!! :O)

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  14. Girl, I totally feel you! It is so tough being a full-time working Momma - we have so many obligations to so many different people PLUS we have to keep up with the housework, cooking, etc?! I actually just blogged about this in my Working Momma Series recently, because I had so many people asking how I keep everything together... it's tough, but luckily I was blessed with the gift of organization, so staying organized is what keeps me sane! Oh, and wine. Lots of wine. ;o)

    Know that you're not alone, though, and feel better soon! :o)

    <3 Linds at LindsaysSweetWorld.blogspot.com

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    1. Yes, Lindsay! I could probably firm up my organization which would definitely help with feeling more relaxed. I've noticed that just the smallest things really do help, like setting out a banana and a bib next to the high chair, and pre-filling a sippy cup with milk at night so that in the morning I can just put Camille in the highchair and feed her without having to run around the kitchen and grab everything I need.

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  15. Mercury is out of retrograde TOMORROW -- praise. Hang in there, girl!

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    1. I need to learn more about that. Teach me!!! And thank goodness!

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  16. I love your honesty. The 'have it all' mantra is just not possible. Life is tough! Juggling everything is hard! We don't have kids yet, but I know my perfectionist tendencies will take a hit when it comes to being a working mother (and that's good, right?!). I never budgeted when I was single, but married an accountant who budgeted everything! It was hard to adapt at first, but I've really come to appreciate knowing what's coming in and out as well as living within parameters.

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    1. Sharyn, you speak the truth! Juggling is hard! Also, that is a great perspective about budgeting.

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  17. Sweet April- I am so sorry you had a hard week!!! They are the worst. I do appreciate your honesty in this post though- sometimes the blogging world tends to make things look picture perfect all the time!!

    Best of luck to you and Ian with house hunting!! This upcoming year will be my last year living on-campus at school in Charlotte (senior year whoo!!), but since I want to stay in Charlotte, apartment hunting will be on the horizon for me next Spring. Charlotte has so many beautiful apartment complexes, but all of the nice ones seem out of my budget! I am hoping I'll be able to find something in my budget and also in a safe neighborhood, near wherever I'll be working, still close to Uptown, etc. :-) I am already stressing about this now, a full year early!! Haha.


    Anyways- hope your weekend is just wonderful!!

    xoxo A
    www.southernbelleintraining.com

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    1. Aw, thank you! Gosh, I remember the days of apartment-hunting in CLT, and it can be very overwhelming! My first apartment was 1420 Magnolia near Park/Woodlawn/Montford, and I loved it there. Fun pool too on the weekends :) My monthly supper club is built from girls who all used to live at 1420 and now have all moved away. Best of luck to you!

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  18. I feel your pain on the house front! We live in a cozy town home right by southpark mall but with a little one on the way we know moving will eventually need to happen... I'm so attached to this area, the ease of popping into Reid's for dinner ingredients and all the great spots to eat! I just wish bigger homes weren't so crazy expensive!

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    1. AMEN! I know your townhouse area well (I recognize it from your bumpdate photos! and it is a fantastic area. But at least you have a fabulous new reason to look elsewhere eventually -- your sweet little boy! You are rocking this pregnancy, by the way!

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  19. I hope today & the weekend give you a little break! I'm so sorry about Camille & hope she's feeling better soon!

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    1. Thanks love. We need a playdate soon ... and thankfully Camille is all better. Tough seeing the little ones not feeling well!

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  20. Hoping that the weekend will bring you a time of refreshment! We all have those weeks. Thank goodness for new days! I hope you like Mint - we use it and love it! We go over our weekly spending/do checks on categories every Saturday. We also use that time to go over calendars and what we would like to do in the next weeks!

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    1. Sara, now THAT is the type of family organization I am hoping to implement. A budget/calendar meeting each Saturday ... so smart!

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  21. I don't think the juggle of time ever really goes away;) but I guess we can just say we are really lucky to have so many special people to devote our time to! Right? Have a relaxing weekend friend!!

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  22. You put it all into perspective beautifully. People to love, a job to go to, a roof (no matter what the size) over our heads. It's all good ... you are SO right!

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  23. We live in Waxhaw (south Charlotte) and no different here either. We looked for a year and decided to stay put, no way could we do another mortgage at what they are requiring now. So we made changes around this old house. Grant it, my kids are grown, so made it a bit easier to decide. I just wanted to be closer to Huntersville for the grandbabies. But, all in all, I have to be thankful they do not live out of state. If it is meant to be, that home will come available, it is all in the timing. Venting - a very, very good thing. Many I see understand exactly where you are coming from!

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  24. oh girl, on #1, I feel you. I work 3 days a week and stay at home 2 days. While I'm so thankful for the routine we have...sometimes I don't feel like I fit in either category very well. I don't fully relate to SAHM, or to WAHM or to working moms. Such a struggle and I'm just trying to focus specifically on whatever my task is for each day. If it's working, then work. If it's my girls, then let's be the fun mom. But oh it's so hard.

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